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Ouatic-7
ouatic_7
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Ouatic-7 [userpic]
Superdick Returns

Superman is a dick, you knew that right?

We all watched Superman Returns last night. It was a bit long but we were entertained. However, it does provide more evidence of Superman's dickery.


Apparently, Superman knocked up Lois. What, the rubber couldn't stop his Supersemen? Or did he tell her "it would feel like a raincoat. I'm clean, honey, and whatever happens I'll be there for you."

Well, these things happen. However, he then leaves town without even telling Lois good bye! How could Mr. X-Ray Vision not know she had a bun in the oven? He just puts his needs first and abandons Lois to single motherhood. Of course, he never told her about the Clark identity so she has no way of tracking him down to get that back child support.

So, years later (years!) he comes back into town and expects Lois to pick up where they left off. However, Lois has found someone new, someone who is there for her and her kid, and while she wavers, she is smart enough to not fall for Superman's lines, again. Oh, sure, he can fly her around (was that supposed to be sex?) the city but what counts at the end of the day is a guy who you can rely on  and Superman gave her ample evidence he is not that guy.

Superman, however, is a total stalker. He lurked outside her house listening to private conversations with his super hearing and later broke in to the house to commune with his son, repeating some crap he got from his own absentee father, Jor-El. Next thing, he'll be abducting the boy.

Current Location: The usual
Mood: bitchybitchy
Tune: Raid - [Hellsing #10] Original Sin- For Not Keeping Virginity
Comments

Oh god thats rich.. I gotta watch it now.

They do try to play down Superman's scummy aspect but it's all up there on the screen.

Seriously? Because if so I now totally have to watch it. I mean I was really ambivilent about seeing it, ever, but this changes everything.

Superman, Champion of Truth, Justice and the Deadbeat Dad Way!

I can not tell a lie; what I wrote is all in the movie.

i was just talking with a friend the other day about how many "romantic" stories out there included men who were irresponsible and abusive "getting the girl", and it's true! but they just make them loveable (e.g., Hugh Grant) and the assholes get away with it on film. I think you've just proven our point!

At least Superman doesn't get the girl in this one!

yeah, that's good. when did that movie come out?

Last summer, I think.

hm. sounds eminently missable to me, but then i really see very few movies anymore. too many words and images in my head as it is!

I didn't care much for the movie, either. Yes, Superman is a dick. But at least now he has character flaws. Still didn't help out the movie, though *shrugs*

I think screwing Lois without revealing his Clark identity goes beyond flaw into villain territory. At least Kitty knows who she is sleeping with.

i think i post in another place that superman is a deadbeat stalking father.
I mean this guy has not paid child support. I think "Cyclops" should have blown his ass away.
I did like Kevin Spacey. He was not to emotional as Gene Hackman nor was he idiotic as Micheal Rosenbaum(Dude, the guy keeps saving your life and you still cannnot figure it out after 6 seasons)

The good news is that in the next Superman movie, he is suppose to go up againstsome super- villian (I.e.Metallo)
The one after that one is suppose to be the one they combine forces with Batman.
But if Kal-El keeps acting this way, Batman should just go ahead and put the Kryptonite hand cuffs on the man and lock him up forever.

Agree about Cyclops! However, I fear, because of the Lois/Superman lobby, that he dies, heroically(!), in the next movie.

first he gets vaporized by the red head bitch who cannot control her urges.
Next he will bite the dust because of another UNFAITHFULWHore who has banged anyone who can fly. (Plane or no plane)
The good thing is they have set up for a future teen titan movie, which means we get to see Starfire *Wolf whitsles*
Personnally, let us skip all of these losers and get him to battle Lord Darksied NOW.

Geez, another universe lacking Larry Niven (author of Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex).

Thanks for watching it, though. At least now I'll know what's going on when I finally see bits of it on TBS.

I did think of that article...

I suppose there wouldn't have been much of a movie if the reason Kal-El beat it back to Krypton was to escape the forces of the law for woman slaughter.

OK, I'm lying, that would have been a more interesting movie but not one they would have expected to make any money. ANd how would they explain what happeneded? WOuld we see the semen speeding up Lois's vagina and then rushing throught the rest of her body until it burst out of her? Ewwwww!

I don't know who created that site, but I want to have their baby.

It is awesome. Watching th emovie last might, MD and I couldn't help but wonder if the screenwriters were fans.

I was introduced to it by somnambulicious.

I've never been that into Superman, so I got a big kick out of it.

superman is no dick

after thinking this over, i feel we should take back the comment that Superman is a dick.
This is an insutl to dicks everywhere (you should know where i am going with this one)

IT IS NOT EASY BEING A DICK
You have these two nuts hanging around you
your best freind is a pussy
your next door neighbor is an asshole
Your best friend's next door neighbor is an asshole also.
and people keep blowing you off

Re: superman is no dick

You do not suggest an alternate term...

I gotta see this movie now. And to think, I rented Talladega Nights the other day instead for the Will Ferrell/Sacha Cohen kiss when I could have been watching dead-beat Superman.

Yeah! WHat the heck were you thinking?

Crazy thoughts!